A New Disease

Medical researchers have discovered a new disease that has no symptoms. It is impossible to detect, and there is no known cure. Fortunately, no cases have been reported thus far.
George Carlin

A Brief History Of Medicine:

I have an earache.
2000 B.C. - Here, eat this root.
1000 A.D. - That root is heathen, say this prayer.
1850 A.D. - That prayer is superstition, drink this potion.
1940 A.D. - That potion is snake oil, swallow this pill.
1985 A.D. - That pill is ineffective, take this antibiotic.
2000 A.D. - That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root.

Inner Peace

I think I've found inner peace. My therapist told me a way to achieve inner peace was to finish things I had started.
Today I finished 2 bags of potato chips, a lemon pie, a fifth of Jack Daniels and a small box of chocolate candy.
I feel better already.
Unknown


Chocolate is a Vegetable

Chocolate is derived from cocoa beans.
Bean = vegetable.
Sugar is derived from either sugar cane or sugar BEETS.
Both of them are plants, in the vegetable category.
Thus, chocolate is a vegetable.
To go one step further,
chocolate candy bars also contain milk,
which is dairy.
So candy bars are a health food.
Chocolate-covered raisins, cherries,
orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit,
so eat as many as you want.

Remember - - -
"STRESSED" spelled backward is "DESSERTS"
Send this to four women and you will lose 2 pounds.
Send this to all the women you know (or ever knew), and you will lose 10 pounds.
(If you delete this message, you will gain 10 pounds immediately.)"That's why I had to pass this on - - - - - I didn't want to risk it."

Courtesy: Internet